July 2010

We spent the first part of July at my Dad's house while we prepared for my Nana's funeral and celebrated the 4th with my family.  Here is the photographic evidence...

Baby calf!  Apparently Dad bought a pregnant cow and didn't know it...what a surprise to see this little guy in the middle of June!

Lynn Powell and Charlotte Bowers (cousins of my Nana) were gracious enough to have us at their tea room for lunch the day after Nana's funeral.  It is wonderful!  If you're ever in Walland, TN, you should have lunch there!  It's in a house that's been in our family for generations!

Memories of 'Ole Tea Room in Walland, TN

Kay, Don, Charlotte, Lynn, and Daddy

This is my great-great Grandparent's house on the river in Walland, John and Rhoda McNeilly.  (Granny Rhody)  No pics of the inside because they haven't chased the copperheads out from around it yet this summer...I don't want any part of that, thankyouverymuch.

My Nana's handwriting with her dill pickle recipe.  My Aunt Gina was kind enough to help me make some when we were home for the 4th weekend!

Hot dill pickles...they are OH SO GOOD!

And this is what happens when you give a 6 year old a camera and tell her to take pictures of you making pickles...Ellie and I cutting up cucumbers...

Kenley with part of her head cut off...

Um...the stove with an empty jar on it?...

Deer!

Zucchini...Thanks Mollee!  I appreciate your expert photography of the pickle making  ;)

And so the July 4th party begins.  They posed for this picture because I told them I was gonna put it on facebook.  I'm not sure if I should be worried about that or not...

Gina and Hali Beth (oh, and Toby!)

Annie get your gun!  (Yup, this is my little photographer...these next few pics might explain those others a little better...)

Waiting for Dad-O to hand out the ice cream!

Then Mollee got to lick the churner...she WORE that ice cream by the end of the night...haha!

Ice cream soup!  They made me promise to put this one on facebook too.

Later in July we had the chance to go to the lake with Daniel and Erica.  Apparently I didn't get any pics of Josh and I that day (I have to get better about that!), but I got a great one of the two lovebirds and a dragonfly.  ;)  Owell! I'll take what I can get!

And this is a really huge house near the dam.  I'm not even sure this picture does it justice...the place is MASSIVE!

Dear Martha Stewart

Back in my grad school days, I would come home for lunch to have a bit of a reprieve from the craziness. I usually watched the Martha Stewart show...can't really tell you why, maybe because it was good mindless entertainment at the time. I don't know that I would choose to watch it now. Anyhoo...

On one show, she said that if you burn a candle while you are chopping onions, the onions won't make you cry. Since I had lots of onions to chop tonight, I thought I would test it out...



Dear Martha Stewart, Maybe I need a bigger candle, or a different kind of fire because it didn't work...



*This pic was taken AFTER I could see enough to walk down the steps and retrieve the camera...there was one point that I was crying so much I completely soaked the left sleeve of my shirt trying to dry it up so I could see where I was going. Ignore the "sad eyes." Apparently they're the same as the "Oh my gosh my eyeballs are burning out of their sockets" eyes.

Personal chef

So, I bought this apron a few months ago because I am a VERY messy cook. And because I liked it because it said "Queen of Everything" with a rhinestone crown (that smear is cake batter...it's not supposed to be there). And because I had a 20% off coupon and it was already on sale. Josh makes fun of me when I wear it because he says I look like a grandma. Not that I care. Well, when he donned the apron the other day (making fun of me, of course) I had to take a pic!

He said he had to wear it because he was cooking my supper.


And, here's the supper. LOL! (Complete with the screwdriver and box cutter on the counter in the background because I hadn't finished the backsplash yet....but I promise I cleaned off the stove and the other side of the counter!)


I mean, who doesn't love some chili, fritos and cheese? I love anything when I'm not "cooking" it. Thanks Josh!

Furbabies...

Nothing like enjoying some perfect fall weather. Mid-60's and sunny. Perfect.

Lucy prefers not to be bothered when she's laying on the porch...


Linus perches in the door so the squirrels and rabbits can't see him. When he's not here, he's hiding behind a tree. :)


Sweet girl...she's so glad her daddy is home from Arizona! (and so am I!)


Aw! What a perfect November day! :)

The award for wasteful packaging goes to...

On October 15, I got a package at my back door. It was this HUGE box...


I racked my brain for what on earth I had ordered that was that big?! Oh wait...when I lifted the box, it felt like there was nothing in it! The return was from Walmart. Here's what I found when I opened it...


You have GOT to be kidding me! After I got rid of the bubble wrap and random brown paper, this was what was left...


Yes, seriously. 8, 8x10 frames. That was all.


And the award for wasteful packaging goes to...Walmart! Good thing we recycle. Otherwise I would feel terrible about their waste of cardboard!

Funny dog

I walked in the den the other night and found Lucy like this. I cracked up laughing because at first it looked like she had no front legs! They were dangling down between the couch cushions. Maybe it's only funny because she's my dog, but I thought I'd share! ;)

A Pint for a Pint

Josh pointed out that people are going to stop reading my blog if I don't start posting again soon, so here ya go! Instead of showering and going to bed early, I'll be blogging tonight. I'll let my boss know it's all your fault tomorrow. (Don't worry though, I will shower at some point.)

Several weeks ago, Bruster's Ice Cream sponsored "A Pint for a Pint" with Blood Assurance. So, for donating pint of blood, you get a pint of this...



YUM! All I have to say is that Blood Assurance really knows how to reel Josh and I in! They do this promo every 2-3 months, and we always show up! Well, after you donate blood, they wrap your arm in this pretty coban (that's the stretchy stuff that sticks to itself) to keep pressure on the needle puncture for a little while after you donate. See? This is mine...


And for those of you who know my husband, you know he's a goofball. ALL. THE. TIME. I never get a serious moment around here. So, when the girls asked him what color coban he wanted, his reply was, "I'll rock whatever you give me." Yes, seriously, he said that. So, what did he get?


Oh yes he did. And he rocked it in line at Brusters, at the Sears outlet store, and all the way home. Here's a pic so you can appreciate the whole package...cowboy boots, Chicago Bears t-shirt, jeans and a blue wrap with a pink bow. That's really hot, honey...really hot.

Jalapeno funny

We had some jalapenos from the garden that really needed to be used this weekend, so I asked Josh to go to All Recipes and search for "jalapeno," and let me know if he sees a recipe he will eat.

So, he's reading down through the recipes, and he says, "Can dyed jalapenos? What on earth is that?"

I reached around to turn the computer toward me and read, "Candied jalapenos." I started laughing, and all Josh could say...

"Go ahead and blog about that one."

LOL!

You have to watch this!

Renee posted this today, and I totally had to steal it! If Josh had seen this before we got married, ours would have been just like it! :) Love it!

"To delete this message, press 7..."

I called Josh when I left my last patient's house today to let him know I was on my way home. (Even though I knew he was at the golf course, I just thought I'd leave him a message.) He actually answered the phone...on the golf course. That might be a first.

Anyway, I told him I was on my way home, then I asked if he had heard from his mom.

"No" he says, obviously distracted.

Well, I start telling him that she had broken her arm and 3 ribs today (she's okay now, and seeing an Orthopedist on Thursday...But it's a really busy time at work for her, so I know prayers would be greatly appreciated...anyhoo...). All of the sudden I hear him punching numbers on the phone while I'm in the middle of the story.

At first, I ignored them, thinking he had the phone propped on his shoulder while he was doing something else. But when it kept on, I finally said, "Josh! Why are you punching numbers?"

"Oh. I'm an idiot."

"What?"

"Well, I thought I was listening to my voice mail."

"And you were trying to DELETE me?!"

At this point he started laughing really hard.

"This is why you say you never got my message about *insert random subject here*...because you delete them half way through the message! Did you hear anything I just said to you?"

"Yeah, my mom broke her arm and ribs...is she okay?"

"Yeah, she's fine."

"Okay, I gotta hit. I'll call you later."

*Sigh* What a boy! :)

Sock thief

My sweet baby girl has one major issue...she loves socks. And I don't mean likes, I mean obsessed with socks. We thought we were safe with the tall laundry basket because she couldn't fish them out of there. In the last few weeks she has figured that out too. See?




Happy girl, finally got what she wanted.


We buy socks around here like they're going out of style. If you ever come visit, don't say I didn't warn you!

So we were in Walmart the other night...

as I was shopping the produce, Josh punches me in the arm and says, "That dude is getting her digits in the middle of Walmart!"

Sure enough, this guy had stopped some random girl in the middle of the aisle and asked for her number.

And SHE GAVE IT TO HIM! And said she would be expecting his call 30 minutes later.

Yes, seriously. Would you give your number to some random guy in Walmart?

So there's this girl

that works out at my gym. I don't know her real name, but Josh calls her "lunar eclipse."

Because her boobs are seriously that big.

Which I probably would have never noticed except for the fact that her "work out shirts" are cut down to her belly button, and her boobs are on display for anyone within 100 yards. Every night she's in the gym, Josh and I have a bet if the twins are coming out of her shirt or not.

I would take a picture as proof, but no cameras are allowed in the gym (probably because of her).

You know it's a problem when even I can't quit staring.

I hope she doesn't read my blog! :)

My new header pic

is from http://www.photofunia.com. Check out my latest addiction. :)

I just want to point out...

that our video camera is NOT digital. It's old school. Like 8 track or something. If Josh can figure out how to get the video from the camera to the computer, I'll post the video from the previous post. But I can promise that I won't be able to figure it out. So, I'll let ya know. ;)

Oh! And I also want to point out that after she cut of the 1 branch that took her two hours, she then sat at the base of the tree, staring up at it until dark (which was at least a few more hours). After dark, I don't know because I lost interest.

If that doesn't convince you she's crazy, how's this...one of our neighbors works at the gym where we work out. He was telling me that one night he and friend left their house at 1 in the morning to go to Krystal (are they even open that late...seriously?!), and she was standing in her front yard in her robe, with no shoes, holding both her German Shepherds, a leash in each hand, surveying the neighborhood. She was still standing in the same spot when they came back 30 minutes later.

She's flippin' crazy. Seriously.

My crazy neighbor

And I don't mean a good kind of crazy. I'm pretty sure she's a year or two away from being committed. Seriously.

So, she has this dead tree in her yard, right on my fence line. We are seriously concerned that some storm will blow it down onto our house. So, we have asked her to have it cut down. We have even spoken to her ex-husband (who she says still makes all the decisions about the house..yeah, I'm confused about that too) about having it cut down.

Well, I was totally relieved today when I came home and she was attempting to cut it down. Wha? Yes, she had a pruning saw and was cutting it apart branch by branch. (This is a 100 foot tall tree...at least...that I can't even wrap my arms around...just so you can put it in perspective a little bit). Actually, it took her 2 hours to cut off one branch...which fell on the fence and bent it up.

Josh has video with his commentary (which is pretty entertaining). The best part is that she saw him video-ing her and just kept on cutting. How's that for some entertainment this afternoon?

Ummm...

Josh took a job last December with Farm Bureau Insurance, and he's really enjoyed working there so far. He gets along great with the guys he works with (they're 3 of a kind...I'm not sure how they get any work done!) As with any job where you deal with people, he sometimes gets interesting phone calls. He (well, his secretary, D) got one of those last Friday. The conversation went a little like this...

D: Farm Bureau, can I help you?
Caller: I need someone to identify a snake for me.
D: Hold please. Josh? This guy needs someone to identify a snake. What do I tell him?

*I should say at this point that TN Farm Bureau has never really offered a service to identify random wildlife. They are a group that has lobbied for the interests of those living in rural areas, among other things. The office Josh works at sells insurance. Period. Not sure why this guy thought they would be the right ones to call. Anyhoo, if you want to know more about what the TN Farm Bureau does, click here.*

Josh: Ask him what it looks like.
D: Are you serious? He's on line 2, you talk to him.
Josh: I'm not picking up the phone!
T (another secretary): Give him this number and tell him it's not a service we provide.
D: Okay. *She proceeds to get back on the phone and talk to the guy for 5 more minutes. After she hangs up, she says to Josh* It's black with yellow checks.

Maybe it's a "had to be there" kind of funny, but I got a kick out of it. :)

Turtle Tales

So, we were on the way to church this morning, and for once we actually would have been on time. That's right, I said "would have been." We're driving down Bonny Oaks about 1/2 mile from church when traffic stops completely. We're about 4 cars back, and I can tell there hasn't been a wreck, but cars are stopped on both sides of the road. These people keep getting out of their car, bending down to do something, then running back...then repeat that sequence over and over. Did someone hit a dog?

Finally these people give up on whatever they were trying to do, get back in their car, and drive off. They were coming the other way, so people keep driving through on that side of the road. Meanwhile, we're still stopped. Clearly, whatever it is, it's in our lane of traffic. Then, another car stops (still coming from the other way), and a big burly guy gets out to walk over and see whatever it is that's in the road. (For the record, we were not in a place where I could easily get out of the car and walk up there, or I would have.) I see him bend down, and when he stands up I can see it. He has a GIANT snapping turtle by the tail, and he slings him over the guardrail into the creek below the road. I wanted to roll down my window and applaud, but Josh wouldn't let me.

For the record, had it been me in that front car, I would have ran over that sucker then backed over him again. Before you go gettin' your panties in a wad about "all God's creatures", let me explain...

When I was a kid, my parents bought my brother and I baby ducks for Easter. I named mine Beethoven. (Go ahead, call me a nerd...) He was the ugly one, so I wanted him. I gave all the others to my brother to name. When they got big enough, we turned them out on the pond, and would go down every night to feed them (you know, just in case their instincts didn't kick in or something).

One day when I came home from school, I went down to see Beethoven, and I noticed his cute little bottom in the air. How cute! He's foraging for food (or so I thought). But when he never came back up I realized something was terribly wrong. Turns out that he HAD, in fact, been foraging. What he found was a snapping turtle that bit his head off. INJUSTICE! I decided that this couldn't happen. Fortunately, my whole family agreed and made a sport of hunting snapping turtles that summer.

Our first night of turtle hunting, we (by "we" I mean me, my dad, my mom, my uncle Ned, and one of my friends...it was either Bobbi or Autumn...I can't remember which, but I bet they do!) all stood on the side of the pond and threw out catfish food. The unsuspecting turtles surfaced to eat it. As soon as they poked their little noses above the water, my dad was ready with the shotgun. BAM, BAM, BAM!!! And the turtle disappeared. My mom is screaming the whole time, "Shoot him again, Kenny, shoot him again! Oh! I hate guns! Shoot him again!" It was hysterical! :)

In about 30 seconds, we see this HUGE wake going toward the bank, and this giant turtle emerged. It's shell was close to 2 feet long. My dad walked up to it, and the turtle hissed at him. He noticed it had a bullet hole between it's eyes. However, that did not stop it from coming after him! So, he shot it point blank. And the thing kept coming. So, he shot it point blank...again. And it stopped crawling, but it was still hissing.

I don't remember if it was this same night or the next one, but at some point my Uncle Ned broke out the semi-automatic and peppered the water every time a turtle poked his nose up. All the while my mom was screaming, "Shoot it again! Oh! I hate guns! Shoot it again!"

All in all we killed almost 20 snapping turtles that summer. We didn't lose any more ducks. But you see, I have a history with the things, and I will run over one every chance I get. For the sake of all the baby duckies out there.

So, next time you see one on the road, don't stop. Just run it over...do it for the baby duckies. :)

Another LOL moment

So, Josh and I are both a little obsessed with not having dry skin. We both have Gold Bond lotion in our cars just in case we are driving and have a dry skin moment. Go ahead, laugh. You know you'll ask to borrow it next time you ride with me.

Anyhoo, we were driving up to Knoxville last weekend and I noticed that Josh's arms were dry. Since he was driving, I said, "Stick your arm over here and I'll lotion it for you." (Because when he trys to multi-task when he drives, I usually yell at him to pay attention and keep it between the lines...he just thinks he's a safe driver with his knees. He's really not. So I thought I'd be nice and put lotion on his arms for him. I didn't want people thinking I had a crusty-skinned husband.)

So he complies (because he knows I won't leave him alone until he does, anyway), and I slather on some Gold Bond. How do men put on lotion? Cause I couldn't get it past his arm hair to his skin. And I got so tickled that I had to stop because I was balling his arm hairs in knots. For the record, he did NOT think it was so funny. He just kept looking at me like I had three heads. Finally I gave up and slicked his arm hairs down (also for the record, I felt like the lotion reached his skin at this point). Then I got tickled again because his arm hairs were all slicked down the same direction and really dark because of the lotion. I told him he looked like a Sasquatch. He was not amused. But I was. :)

LOL moment

Friday afternoon I had an LOL moment. Not just using the acronym, seriously laughing out loud in my car. Here's what happened...

I got home from work a little early because I had to meet with the cabinet guy (we're finally ordering kitchen and basement cabinets...hooray!) Shortly after he left, I noticed my cell phone wouldn't work. Well, since I definitely HAD NOT dropped it on the tile floor twice already that day (er...maybe three times and the third happened about 5 minutes before it stopped working...I mean, hypothetically speaking, that might have happened...). Anyhoo, I felt sure it was broken by no fault of my own. ;)

I had to run out and get a birthday present for the cutest kid ever (pics from his party later), so I thought I'd swing by the Verizon store on the way. My first clue that the ENTIRE Verizon network was down in Chattanooga should have been the fact that there were at least 50 cars in the parking lot. (Think I'm exaggerating? I'm not. It was a traffic jam trying to pull in.) I have NEVER been to that store when there are more than 5 cars...maybe 5. So, I parked next door in the KMart parking lot, and walk to Verizon. The poor lady holding open the door looked incredibly frazzled, and she was repeating over and over "The entire network is down. If your only problem is that you can't call out or receive calls, we can't help you right now. We are aware of the problem, and it will be fixed within the hour. It's your choice if you would like to wait."

People were coming into the store in droves...it was crazy! Like, Black Friday shopping crazy amount of people. So, I decided to leave and take the chance that my phone wouldn't work because of the network. (FYI, that *was* the problem...my phone works fine now!) As I sat in the traffic jam to pull back out of the parking lot, I literally laughed out loud. First of all, WHY are all these people not at work on a Friday afternoon at 3:00...er...me included? Second, how sad is it that we are that reliant on our cell phones...me included!